Tag Archives: advice

THE INGREDIENTS TO ABUNDANCE

Abundance1

“The groundwork to abundance is right thinking.”

There is a simple inner recipe to manifest “abundance.”  The recipe requires “Right thinking!”

The first ingredient to manifest abundance is right thinking. You must know without a shadow of a doubt that abundance is yours. You are entitled to abundance! Abundance is yours for the asking! GOD Created you with everything you need and want in abundance!

The second ingredient is to be convinced that “how” abundance is manifested into your life is none of your business.

Once the first 2 ingredients are solidified in your thinking, the next ingredient is to ask for what you want, describe the abundance you want to see in your life, world and affair.

The last and most important ingredient is Faith!  You must have Faith beyond a shadow of a doubt that the abundance you asked for is yours. You must feel the feeling you will have knowing that the abundance is already yours.

Allow your Faith to be activated and feel the feeling that you will have when your abundance is present. Activate your imagination!

As you work on your right thinking to lay your groundwork to your abundance, it is important that you keep in mind the details of your abundance is GOD’s job. You only need to ask, believe and relax, in other words, have FAITH.

If reading this recipe makes you feel hopeful but you have no idea where to start, email me for a FREE 20 minute Life Coaching session: niecatlifecoach@yahoo.com.

Coach Arthur, Certified Professional Life Coach
www.niecatlifecoaching.com
www.niecat.com
https://www.facebook.com/Niecatlifecoach
http://linkedin.com/in/coach-arthur-81342556

 

 

 

“Five ways to Raise a Grateful child”

Every parent wants the best for their children. Ideally, every parent wants their children to be happy, healthy and grateful. As a matter of fact, research indicates that modern families classify “gratitude as one of the traits of a healthy family.
It is easy and natural to teach children to say “thank you,” but the challenge is to teach them the feeling of gratitude. The benefits of having a thankful heart and living in a manner where being thankful is a way of life is ideally what every family should strive for. Raising children who live in a thankful state will create individuals who will experience stronger social relationships, life satisfaction, stronger psycholigical well being as well as overall good health.
Gratitude is more than just saying thank you. Gratitude is not just a behavior. Gratitude is an internal experience. According to a research study done in Raising Grateful Children, there is a four-part model of gratitude that concentrates on the items that people give us. The four parts are: analyzing why the items were given, connecting receiving gifts to the feeling it creates, having appreciation for the gift received and showing appreciation for the gift received. The game plan for assuring your child develops heartfelt gratitude is to begin the habit of engaging the 4 parts of the gratitude model, NOTICE-THINK-FEEL-DO. Below are five strategies to foster gratitude within children.
MODEL THANFULNESS
Parents who are grateful daily for the trivial things have children who develop a grateful attitude. As a matter of fact, parents who demonstrate a grateful attitude daily have a higher chance to demonstrate parenting behaviors that foster gratitude. An ideal practice would be to model gratitude by expressing appreciation. Parents should also consider the benefits their children will acquire by seeing them model the NOTICE-THINK-FEEL-DO attributes of gratefulness. These internal behaviors can simply be implemented by sharing thoughts of gratitude out loud.

EMBED IT
The decision a parent makes on what type of environment or niches they create for their children is vital on creating an attitude of gratitude. The niches parents create such as afterschool activity to the playground they choose to spend time should be guided by the goal which is creating an attitude of gratitude. Research confirms that parents who choose activities for their children that instill gratitude create children with grateful hearts. This is vital because it gives parents the tools to affect the children’s attitude of gratitude. Parents should be mindful of the environment they select for their children. There should be a balance in activities that foster healthy bodies and competition and activities which engage children in civic engagement and community service. When parent make a conscious effort of creating children with grateful hearts, the choices made of where time will be spent benefit the children in several ways.

TALK ABOUT IT WHEN IT IS THERE
Parents should take advantage of moments when their children share gratitude as “teachable moments.” Using open-ended questions will allow children to remember grateful experiences with greater details.
TALK ABOUT IT WHEN IT IS NOT THERE
The study found that parents found it challenging to speak with their children about times when they were not grateful. When the children missed an opportunity to share gratefulness, when they showed entitlement or simply missed the opportunity to experience gratitude the parent may feel upset, can be embarrassed and discouraged. The question is how does a parent keep their cool and help children to use these challenging situations as a learning opportunity? In order for parents to speak to their children about missed opportunities for gratitude, parents need to start by using the same conversational skills when talking about times of gratitude. Listening carefully to children’s experiences of these moments, through open-ended child-centered conversation, may provide parents with clues as to what is getting in the way of their children experiencing gratitude. Are they making assumptions about how a gift came their way? Are they focusing on something else in the moment that is important to them and distracting them? Do they not yet have the skill of seeing the situation from someone else’s perspective? These are questions that parents need to ponder if faced with this challenge.
By first learning about how children see these moments, parents may gain new insights into how to get these moments back on track and help children to catch opportunities for gratitude when they come along.
REPEAT IT OFTEN
To become proficient at anything, one needs practice, reflection and time to become an expert at the skill. Is challenging for children to analyze gifts received through thoughts and feelings since it demands for them to depend upon other-focused developmental skills such as perspective and empathy. As children’s brains mature and they practice gratitude, the skills become easier. They become proficient in learning to make the connection between thoughts and feelings and this practice becomes a lifelong skill that everyone uses over their life time. As children get older, their opportunities to experience gratitude attitude increases. Children who can develop the skill to receive the gift behind the gift are in a better position to experience gratitude in a deeper manner and by developing this skill they are able to express gratitude to others in a deeper level.

The research to teach parents how to develop children with grateful hearts is vast. Reading all the advice can become really overwhelming to parents. Take it one day at a time, and if support is what you need, in order to be proficient at teaching your children how to live a grateful life, email me for a FREE 20 minute Life Coaching session: niecatlifecoach@yahoo.com

https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/five_ways_to_raise_a_grateful_child
The GGSC’s coverage of gratitude is sponsored by the John Templeton Foundation as part of our Expanding Gratitude project.

Bitter or BETTER, You Choose!

BitterorBETTER

There are many choices we must make on a daily basis. We can choose to be bitter or we can choose to be BETTER.

Today I submit to you that we should ALL choose BETTER. When we choose bitter, we bring forth more bitterness into our lives, world and affairs.

As I ponder upon what I have gone through I choose to forgive myself and I choose to forgive others, I release past hurts and I choose to be good to me. I release myself from past experiences that I perceived as hurtful.

Choosing to stay bitter, choosing to stay hurt may allow me to feel the support of others, the pitty of others for awhile, however, this trend will not put me in the pass to my Highest Good! I will not be able to begin again in this stage.

In order for me to have miracles in my life, in order for GOD to Truly direct my steps, I have to choose BETTER, I have to choose me and I can’t choose me if I choose bitter.

I have a choice, I can choose to have a grievance or I can choose to be and to have a miracle, bottom line, I can’t choose both.

I choose BETTER!

If you want to learn how to make WISE choices in your world and you need assistance and encouragement, I am the Life Coach for you! Email me for a FREE 20 minute Life Coaching session: niecatlifecoach@yahoo.com

A Year of Miracles: Daily Devotions and Reflections – Day 222  MarianneWilliamson

Making Wise Choices,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com
www.niecat.com
www.facebook.com/niecatlifecoaching
http://www.linkedin.com/pub/carlota-arthur/56/425/813

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Radio Interview

Radio Interview

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LOVE YourSelf

When you read the words in the sand, you consider it elementary. Of course You LOVE Yourself! Really? Do you really LOVE Yourself?

Look at your life, look at the choices you have made, if you were someone else, would you say you LOVE Yourself? Below are a series of questions, answer them HONESTLY, and you will get a general idea on how you feel about yourself:

When is the last time you went to the doctor for a check up?
When is the last time you did something nice for yourself?
When is the last time you put your feelings, needs, desires before someone else’s?
When was the last time you said YES to you?
When is the last time you exercised?
Do you smoke?
Do you drink excessively?
Are you doing something to your body that you know deep inside is not healthy?
Are you following your doctor’s orders?
Listen to your self-talk, what do you think about what you are saying to yourself.
How do you feel when someone give you a complement?
How do you react when someone want to do something nice to you?
Do you ever call yourself a name?
When is the last time you took a nap?

As we enter 2014, let us all choose to LOVE Ourselves!
Believe it or not, LOVING OurSelves will allow Us to LOVE others more!

On the way to Truly LOVING Myself,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Live Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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All Is Well!

All Is Well!

It is not a secret that we all have challenges that we have to face. At times we feel as if we are the ONLY ones going through a challenging experience. Some of us feel that is BEST to keep challenges inside as talking about it might make matters worse or perhaps talking about it will show lack of Faith. All that is fine, but I guarantee you that if you were to hear other peoples’s challenges you will realize that it can always be worse!

Today’s challenges will pass. It is evident. Look at your life, think back to 5 or 10 years ago. Remember that challenge? More than likely you do not. Why? It came to pass and more than likely it happened for your Highest.

Today’s challenges are here to give you bragging rights. You will surpass your challenge, you will come on top. You will end up BETTER than you were before. If you are Wise, amongst your bragging rights you will acknowledge that of you, you can do nothing and you will give GOD All the credit and the Glory.

You know that nothing is here to stay and the ONLY constant we have is change. Be Grateful as you go through your challenges and remember that after your challenge you will have bragging rights.

To your Strength,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
wwww.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 4

Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 4

Teens live in a state of Drama!

The first blog I wrote I named it “Adults forgetting their teenage years.” I want to refer to this article as we explore the 4th lesson our Teens teach us. Often time we become successful adults and totally forget what we said, did, listened and experience when we were 13 – 19. Please think of those days as you read this lesson.

Many times our Teens come to us to tell us their saga, the first responses we murmur sound something like this: “that is nothing!” “don’t worry about it,” “that is nothing to worry about,” “leave those friends alone.” “you are better than him/her, forget them,” These and other responses we give our Teens really discourage them.

If you remember correctly part of being a Teen is feeling things intensely, in other words what you may seem like no big deal to you is hugely important to your Teen. If you continue disregarding their feelings, they will stop talking to you and that is the one thing you DO NOT want!

I often tell parents who I coach to remember that they MUST listen to their Teens challenges intensely. Remember that they are feeling their feelings, they are honoring their feelings and you MUST do the same. You should feel Blessed that your Teen is sharing with you, please do not destroy this trust!
How would you feel if you called your best friend to say you were loosing your home to foreclosure and your friend dismissed you and told you not to worry, then, your friend proceeds to tell you that your issue is silly and it will go away! How would that make you feel?

When your Teen comes to you with their challenges/problems/drama here are some suggestions:
1.Listen
2. Do not give advice.
3. Do not put their friends down.
4. Do not dismiss or minimize their problem!
5. Listen
6 Sympathize
7. Look at the situation as you were a teenager.

If you need guidance in traveling the teenage world, don’t hesitate to email me, niecatlifecoaching@yahoo.com for a FREE 30 minute Parent Life Coaching session.

Happy Navigating the teen world,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 2

Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 2

Last week I took My Daughter, The Cat in NieCat to her Freshman College Orientation. There we were parents and children together. As I looked around, there was one thing “visibly” evident in this orientation. About 90% of these Freshmen were on their cellular devices, including Cat.
When they were talking about financial aid, I couldn’t take it anymore and I asked her to put her phone down and I swear she looked like I asked her to go to bed without dinner or walk home from the orientation.

This is the topic of our 2nd Lesson, according to http://www.webmd.com/parenting/teen the actual devices that keep our teens connected are the same devices that keep them away from us – their families. The article actually suggests that taking our teens’ electronic devices can be considered unkind. “Being networked with their friends is critical to most teens,” says Dr. Stuart Goldman, director of psychiatric education at Children’s Hospital in Boston.

As a Teen Life Coach, I agree with the article in the sense that if your teen is doing the right thing, i.e. school (their main responsibility), chores, being respectful, and most importantly not being withdrawn from the family, then, yes, the electronic devices should stay.

However, if your teen is not following through with your expectations, then, I suggest that taking away the cellular device, lap top, games and anything else they consider their life lines is perfectly acceptable.

Suggestions:
1. Have your teen pay for their cellular phone.
2. Phones must be turned off at least an hour before bed time.
3. No computer in the room.
4. Place parents control on the computers and laptops.
5. No phone usage during dinner time or family time.
6. No phone usage during the drive home from school.

The cellular phone is a battle that us teen parents should really not participate in unless is absolutely necessary. Unless of course our rules/regulations/expectations are not being met.

If you need guidance in traveling the teenage world, don’t hesitate to email me, niecatlifecoaching@yahoo.com for a FREE 30 minute Parent Life Coaching session.

Happy Navigating the teen world,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Our Children need Our Time!

Our Children need Our Time!

We are all busy, and our jobs take us away from our families more than we care to share. We MUST make the decision to make our Children Our Priority when it comes to our time.

It is a challenge being a school administrator, a life coach and a Mom/Abuelita (GrandMom). Sometimes when I get home ALL I want to do is lay down and take a nap, however, I know that 1990 and 1994 seem like it was just yesterday and my girls are young women now. This all happened very quickly, but I am grateful that I h ad the Wisdom to make times for My Girls.

We MUST find time to spend with Our Children, what I do? Well, Honestly, it was not my idea, it just so happened this suggestion comes from the fact that My Girls ALWAYS followed me around when I got home. The Girls use to and still do lay in my bed as I am resting. We are talking, and sharing and I am resting! The BEST of both worlds.

Choose to find a way to spend time with Your Children regardless of what your day looks like.
Suggestion:
1. Have a game night.
2. Have a conversation hour while you cook, rest, use the bathroom (this happens to me ALL the time), or do your house chores.
3. Use driving time as sharing time.

The idea is to make your children KNOW that you really care and you will find time for Them!

Happy time sharing,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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First Mothers’ Day without Mom!

Mother_s_Day

As I ponder upon the title of this blog, I decided to request the expertise of the BEST Elementary School in the Entire Universe. I have the honor to assist in leading The BEST Teachers and Staff who make their jobs their lives. They impact their students’ life on a daily basis without the thought of their pay checks, their working conditions or how their evaluation will impact their career. They concentrate on the students and give them their all knowing that working without parent participation is sometimes a way of life with us. They put forth maximum effort knowing that not having parent participation can negatively impact their evaluations because without parent participation student achievement is extremely challenging!
I asked my faculty one single question, if you had a friend who lost their mother and this will be the first Mother’s day without their Mom, what would you tell them? The answers were very interesting, sometimes simply sharing from the Heart and their Experiences!
Here are some of the answers I received:

MM
There is no right or wrong way to handle MY Mother’s Day. It is a difficult day for any mother to face without her child or for any child to face without their mother. Some people may find it helpful to go away on a mini-weekend trip, totally avoiding any church services, special meals, or family gatherings that they feel will be too hard to attend. While difficult to experience, allowing yourself to grieve is very important and what has helped me. Do not be afraid to deviate from the norm of tradition and make this a day of new beginnings if this is what you feel is right for you. Some mothers and children find comfort in choosing to do something special in memory of their loved one such as take a walk in a quiet place, read a special poem, or even release a balloon in memory of their mother or child. Many choose to use Mother’s day as a special day to plant a flower or a tree in memory of the person who has died. Seeing something growing is often a visible reminder of the ongoing love a mother and child have for each other. Some prefer to spend time “with their loved ones” by visiting gravesites, bringing flowers, and dedicating time to special memories. (I continue to do this almost every weekend).
Whatever you choose to do, remember not to set expectations too high for the day. Plan something that is healing for you, but realize that you will still experience a wide range of emotions. Grief is exhausting mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, so be sure to eat nutritious foods for the day, hydrate yourself with lots of fluids, and allow yourself time to rest and be replenished. Grief work is hard work – so acknowledge that and give yourself some extra care and attention.
By planning ahead for Mother’s Day, you will be better able to handle and manage the difficult emotions you are likely to experience on such a day of remembrance. Telling others that this is going to be a difficult day for you is also a good way of building a support system around you. Others can check in on you throughout the day, or provide support and comfort – or maybe just some company throughout the day. Be gentle with yourself; make allowances to do whatever makes you most comfortable on that day. I remember when I cried EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY! But, the minutes began to erase and I began to cry less and less. Now don’t get me wrong, I STILL CRY FOR MY MIMI!! But I can rest assure that GOD is by her side. Remember that while loss may never get easy, it can get easier. You will “get through it” and with that will come inner strength and a reserve of peace and joy!

BR:
It is very difficult as I don’t have my Mom, my friend, my confidant with me for quite some time. How I handle it is by thinking of all the good times, endless hours of conversations we had because like I said she was my confidant and my best friend. Even Mothers’ Day should be every single day of your life. You should honor your mother every day, every hour and every second. Now that she is gone I remember her with my heart full of LOVE and a little bit crumbled. I pray for her every day and ask God to keep her very close to him so she can continue to guide me from above. Mother’s day is a very important day for me.

GM:
When the enemy death strikes, be it your mother, father, or any other relative, your grief can be great, even though you may have hope in the resurrection. Abraham had faith his wife would live again, yet we read that “Abraham came in to bewail Sarah and to weep over her.” (Genesis 23:2) What about Jesus? When Lazarus died, he “groaned in the spirit and became troubled,” and shortly afterward he “gave way to tears.” (John 11:33, 35) So, when someone you love dies, it does not show weakness to cry, since death is our worst enemy.
Yet, because you have confidence in the resurrection, your sorrow will not be unrelenting. As the Bible says, you will “not sorrow just as the rest also do who have no hope.” (1 Thessalonians 4:13) Rather, you will draw close to God in prayer, and the Bible promises that “HE himself will sustain you.”—Psalm 55:22. This hope is like an anchor that will strengthen you during your time of grief.

RN
The only person I know that lost her mother before Mother’s Day is one of our cafeteria monitors; her mother died last night. I lost my mother when I was 9 years old and Mother’s day only became a happy occasion after I had my own daughter. Before my daughter was born I used to split the day going to my grandmothers’ house, 1/2 a day with one and the other 1/2 with the other. At first, I had no feelings but numbness, (I was there but not taking part) later on as time went by, the pain subsided and I joined the family in the celebrations, but more as a duty than a happy time, when I got my first Mother’s Day card and when my husband came with my daughter in his arms and a bunch of flowers, my Mother’s Day took a turn around, I felt happiness. I still remember my Mother but I can think of her as when she was alive, and feel in my heart that she has always been with me.

MS
The Title would be: “Remembering her LOVE, celebrating her life”
I know how it feels!
My Mother passed away on April 21, 2008. Three weeks before Mother’s day. I missed her and wish she was here every day of my life, but at the same time, if I truly believe that she sees me from above, I don’t want her to see me crying and depressed, and ruin my children’s Mother’s Day. So what do I do? I celebrate my Mother’s Life, sing her songs, cook her meals, love the same way she loved!!

XM
I will suggest to go to the cemetery, put a lot of beautiful flowers and be there for a long time talking with her, and let her know that she will be always be with them every day until they see each other again in front of God. Then, I would suggest spending the rest of the day with their children, and together remember the good time.

DH
This is a true experience for me!
When my best friend lost her mother I invited her to our family dinner/gathering every Mother’s Day. She did this for about 5 years until she started her own family. To this day, she reminds me how blessed I am to ‘Still’ have my mom alive and to never take her presence for granted.

MS
I would suggest to my friend to go to church in the morning and say a prayer for Mom and remind them that mom will always be with them in their heart and watching over the family in heaven. I will remind them that mom is in GOD’s hand and has found true Peace and Happiness.

SP
My mother made her transition on October 9, 2000. That day will forever be embedded within my soul. I had to realize that “getting through” was more than engaging in positive thoughts. Getting through also meant I had to pray without ceasing, leaving the results to GOD and releasing myself to be all right with GOD’s way and his timing. Getting through meant that I had to stand still long enough and often enough to know GOD was and is taking care of it all. My responsibility is simply to keep living my life in GOD’s presence. My simple prayers will get ME through my darkest days. Through GOD, through ME, my MOTHER’S spirit will live forever!
And so it is!

MC
I would suggest that on Mother’s Day do something that would honor Mom. For example if Mom loved the beach, celebrate Mother’s Day with a beach picnic to remember all the good times they had with her at the beach. If she was a gardener, plant flowers in their yard that day, so that when they water, prune it, weed it may make you feel closer to mom. If she was committed to social causes work at a soup kitchen, or if church and GOD were a driven force in her life, visit her church to praise her and thank her for being the angel that guides you and protects you daily. I feel that this way you would still be spending Mother’s Day sharing those things important to her.

ST
I would say to that person. I really feel your less. I lost a parent five years ago. Gather with your family members. Talk, share, remember the wonderful, great times you spent together. Celebrate your mother’s memory by preparing her favorite foods.

JH
Mothers are precious gifts from GOD. Mom might be gone in body, but her spirit lives on. Never give up with keeping her in your life, always remember to share with others, the most wonderful and sweetest memories of her. Keep her dear to your heart. Always find solace in the good things. Keep a positive attitude, try to live up to the values and morals that she instilled in you. If you are faithful to the end you will see mom again in the earth made new… so when Mother’s Day comes around, remember, keep mom in your heart, and cherish the many splendid memories you have of her…. And keep her legacy alive!!!

EW
Losing a mother is a difficult experience. As a mother I would want my children to celebrate the years we spent together and through their Christian upbringing they know I am still celebrating that day with them. The price we pay for having a mother is their death.

MR
Today…. Smile and thank GOD for all the special moments you shared with your mother. Strive to be the person she wanted you to be. Imitate those things you LOVED about her and you will be honoring her. You will one day see her again and she will be proud of you!

It was My Pleasures sharing these entries and I hope that these suggestions can lighten someone’s load.

Happy Mothers’ Day,
Coach Arthur
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com