Category Archives: assistance

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“Go Ahead, You can do it!!!!

Is Possible!

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Posted on April 28, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, empowering, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, motivation, Parenting, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Say YES to Your Teenager!

Say YES to Your Teenager!

I read a very interesting article in “One Tough Job.org” which shared guidelines on having a GREAT relationship with your teenager. I found the article very interesting and the strategies are ones that I have actually used during my parent life coaching sessions, so I wanted to share it with my readers.

Out of the gate, I must say that raising teens is an adventure that is manageable if you arm yourself with the proper tools.

It might look like your teen is not interested in what you are doing and specially what you are saying, but the TRUTH of the matter is that our teens need us now more than ever. Yes, they are busy and at this time in their lives their friends mean a lot to them, but remember, you are the parent, you have been there from the beginning of their time. Choosing to spend time with your teen and LISTENING without JUDGMENT is paramount. I don’t know how you feel about what you just read, you may need to take a deep breath because LISTENING & NON JUDGMENT is the key to a POSITIVE relationship with your teen.

There are 4 suggestions the article features to have a more positive relationship with your teen: Be actively interested in your teen’s life, Talk with your teen, not at them, Share things with your teen and Schedule in family time.

Be actively interested in your teen’s life – I heard a strategy that Our First Lady Michelle Obama uses with her girls and I immediately began using this strategy with mine girls. On the ride back from school I asked two questions, Share a rose with me from today’s experience and share a thorn with me from today’s experience. I found that when Cat got in the car, she was ready to share. In about 5 minutes I was able to gauge the type of day she had and she was happy to share. Become the Mom to their group. I was a Drama Mom, a Color Guard Mom, a Super Star Mom, whatever the girls were involved in, there I was in the mix of things. Some of their friends actually called me a cool Mom. I was the Mom giving rides to their friends whose parents were to busy to pick them up from whatever activities they were having. Needless to say NieCat were physically not happy about this, but I knew in their Hearts they appreciated me being there! Well, at least that is how I am telling the story! 🙂

Talk with your teen, not at them – I go back to one of my first blog post ever. Please remember what it was like being a teen! Stop preaching! When ALL you do is preach, your teen will tune you out. Have a discussion! LISTEN! Listen to what your teen says and actually give it some thought! Listen!

Share things with your teen – Share your past experiences. Let your teen know you were a teen once. My Girls use to LOVE to hear that I got in trouble with GrandPaPa! That would be the highlight of our conversations. Share what is going on right now with them. Explain to them why at this time you may not be able to pay for that $500 ring. Tell the TRUTH. They can handle it, and they will know you are Human! Sometimes our teens think we are not from this world!

Schedule in family time – The time you are experiencing now with your teen will NEVER come back! Choose to make time for your teens. Sometimes when I come home from a crazy day as a school administrator I have nothing else to give the world, so I invite the girls to my room (actually they just follow me to my room) and we all lay in my bed and talk. I am resting my body and my brain, I am listening to my Girls and that is considered family time! Visit them in their room, at your own Risk that is! Don’t criticize how junky and smelly their room is (I must work on this one), just be, see where the conversation leads you!

Our teens are enjoying a very challenging stage, as parents we MUST choose to do parenting differently to achieve teen parenting success!

Happy Teen Parenting,
Coach Arthur, Cerfified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on April 27, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, help, inspiration, motivation, support, Teenagers, Truth, Uncategorized

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If I had no vision, I will surely perish: Proverbs 29:18

 

If I had no vision, I will surely perish: Proverbs 29:18

In order for me to be successful at this game of life, I have to make sure I am focused on what I want out of life. To this accomplish this objective,  I have rules which I follow, these seven rules help me keep focused.

What are the rules you follow?

1. GOD Is First in my life, my world and my affairs.

2. If is in front of me is because I can do it.

3. Even when I fail at it, my daily goal is to be good to others.

4. Out of ALL of my experiences ONLY Good will come.

5. Everything that happens to me happens for my Highest Good. Even when I don’t see it.

6. One day at a time.

7. The World is conspiring in My Favor!

Coach Arthur, Certified Professional Life Coach

http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

 

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Posted on April 21, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, empowering, God, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, motivation, Spiritual, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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You are a Master Piece!

You are a Master Piece!

Think of yourself as Masterpiece!
Think of yourself as one of a kind!
Think of yourself as able to do anything and everything that is in front of you to do!

Yes, I know you have done things that are wrong, I know that you sometimes don’t keep your words, I know, I know, I know…….

What if you place ALL the negative thoughts about Yourself aside for the next four hours?
Let’s call it “Positive Self Reflection!
What if you can recollect ONLY the “good things” you have done.
Make a mental list of your accomplishments (stop thinking negatively right now).
See Yourself as a Winner!
Think thoughts about yourself that will make you smile!

Choose to be gentle with yourself!
Choose to celebrate yourself!

Before you think another thought, think highly of yourself. This is the beginning of a GREAT recipe for your lasting self improvement!

Let me know how your 4 hours of positive Self-Reflection make you feel!

Happy Self Thoughts,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on April 15, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, consultation, empowering, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, Metaphysics, motivation, Parenting, Spiritual, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Worrying? Give Yourself a Break!

Worrying? Give Yourself a Break!

We have GREAT minds!

Think about it!

Have you ever been in a situation where you thought/imagined the worse case scenario?
You scared, upset, depressed, angered, cried, hurt yourself half to death. You argued, cursed, screamed and complained ALL internally, all in your mind, but as the situation resolved itself (as situations ALWAYS do), your worse case scenario was ten times worse than the actual situation.

Give yourself a break!

Stop!

Take a deep breath!

Your Soul (Your GOD Self) Always knows what to do to heal itself, to solve problems. All the answers are in You, within you as you! Silence your mind, stop! Think of the BEST case scenarios instead! Yes, I know what I am asking, is hard, but the beauty of it is that you can do it!

Think a better thought!

Happy Thinking,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach

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Posted on April 5, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, empowering, God, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, Metaphysics, motivation, Spiritual, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Don’t Worry; Be Happy

Don't Worry; Be Happy

Worry steals your joy and peace. It can lead to sleepless nights or sleep-filled days. It can make you listless or jumpy. It can tempt you to eat to much or too little. Whatever extremes you experience are symptoms of imbalance.

The time to spent in worry is fruitless. No matter how long or how deeply you worry, it will gain you nothing. After you finish indulging in unproductive, fear-based thoughts and behaviors, you will have to do the work to recuperate. So why bother? Whatever the circumstances, don’t worry; be happy!

The bible tells us to cast our cares on GOD.

When worry thoughts come, quickly replace them with principle-based thoughts. Call forth your spiritual faculty of strength to help you be persistent. Stay committed to improving the way you deal with life.
Do your share, and let GOD handle the rest.

“He removes every branch in me that bears no fruit. Every branch that bears fruit he prunes to make it bear more fruit.”
John 15:2

Daily Inspiration for Better Living
Universal Foundation for Better Living/Daily Inspiration
p. 13
Friday, March 8, 2013

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Posted on March 10, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, daily word, empowering, God, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, Metaphysics, motivation, Spiritual, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Common Sense is not Common

Common Sense is not Common

Common Sense is not Common!

Am sitting here in Nassau, Bahamas being extremely happy as I celebrate my B*Day weekend and enjoy the sound of the ocean waves from my hotel room (this was a BIG Dream for me). Here is the thing,
is 4:19 a.m. and I am up! Why? One thing, I am excited about going outside to walk in the beach when morning time comes (yes, at 48 I am still a kid at heart), and am also suffering from a very nasty allergy attack. Being grateful and surfing channels I came across The Steve Harvey Show. He shared three rules that I just must share. Needless to say, me being me, I had to put my own spin to Steve Harvey’s three common sense rules.

DREAM BIG
We are ALWAYS thinking, always! Let us put our thinking time for good use. Think BIG!
What do you want?
Just think it!
Just feel it!
Go into your mind file cabinet and remember everything that you ever wanted to do. Go way back, select the BIGGEST Dream that has ever crossed your mind and dust it off. If you believe in GOD (I highly recommend you do) pray for the wisdom to make your BIG Dream come into fruition. If your dream is in the forefront of your mind, cultivate it. Give yourself permission to succeed. Give your BIG Dream permission to be manifested in your life, world, and affairs. See it! Smile as you think about it! See yourself in your BIG Dream!

INCH BY INCH ANYTHING IS A ZINCH
Once you figure out what your dream is, do something about it. Start small, just one action a day. Think about your BIG dream. Do something about your dream on a daily basis. Think about the feeling you will have when you achieve your dream.
What will it feel like?
What will you hear?
What would you feel?
Little by little formulate your BIG Dream in your head, feeling the feeling of manifesting your dream and be grateful for your BIG Dream coming into fruition.

LIFE IS 10% WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU AND 90% WHAT YOU DO ABOUT IT!
Even the BEST thinking person will have challenges in life. Everyone has challenges, is not the challenge, is the way we handle it. When you are in the process of seeing your BIG Dream in your mind’s eye and you begin doing something about it.
How are you going to react when the first obstacle appears?
What will you do when the 100’s obstacle appear?
example: You are in the grocery store and the line is really short, you are next and in a hurry.
What are your going to do?
What will you choose?
You can become exasperated, start complaining and become miserable in your mind, where ONLY you live OR you can use this time to think gratefully about your BIG Dream! You can use this time to pray, think happy thoughts, exercise your affirmations, review your vision statement mentally or send the cashier and customer thoughts of light and harmony.
What will you choose????

Coach Arthur
Life Coach

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Posted on February 16, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, God, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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The Four Agreements for Parents

The Four Agreements for Parents

The agreements you are about to read were taken from the book: “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz.

There are Four Agreements that parents should follow when it comes to parenting:
1. Be Impeccable with Your Word.
2. Don’t take anything personal.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions.
4. Always do Your Best.

Be Impeccable with Your word:
I have addressed this issue before in other posts. Children really learn and do what we do, seldom they learn what we say. Being impeccable with your word teaches children to do the same. As parents we must follow through on what we say to our children. If you plan to go some where don’t tell your children until you are 100% sure you can go. If you give your child a consequence you MUST follow the consequence through. That is what teaches your children you mean business. Being impeccable with your word is what teaches children to be impeccable with their word.

Don’t take anything personally:
As a school administrator I have to tell parents this one all the time. When your child does something wrong, something that perhaps brings embarrassment to your family name, please get over yourself. Yes, I get it! I have been there and done that. However, the truth of the matter is that because your child stole candy from the store does not mean that you are a thief, or that your child sees you stealing (ideally your child should NEVER see you doing anything illegal).
Here is an example: I have made my bed everyday for the last 23 years ( that’s how long I have been a Mom). NieCat are aware of my bed making passion. As they were growing up, I always told them to make up their beds. Now at 22 and 18 they NEVER make up their bed. At first I considered myself a failure for not teaching them correctly, however, now following the Four Agreements, I don’t take it personally. Our children are their on persons, they came here to learn their own individual lessons and sometimes those lessons are independent of us.

Don’t Make Assumptions:
You children consider you their Hero. Don’t assume that because you have to give them consequences/punishments they will not like you or think less of you. Don’t assume that because your neighbors children look nice from the outside that they don’t have issues. Stop assuming your parenting skills are not adequate. Stop assuming period! When you assume you make the assumption about you and you MUST remember agreement #1, don’t take things personally.

Always Do Your Best
You can only do what you can do. You are doing the BEST parenting possible with the tools that you have. You are right where you need to be. There is a Higher Forth in your life directing your steps and finally, if you need direction, if you need someone to encourage you, support you and help you to establish parenting goals seek someone like me (shameless plug), seek a Parenting Life Coach. Everyone needs help once in awhile is okay to ask for it.

Think about these Four Agreements as you do your parenting from moment to moment and you will be on your way to parenting success!

Happy Parenting,
Coach Arthur

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Posted on February 10, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, support, Teenagers, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Gratefulness is the way to go!

Gratefulness is the way to go!

Parents, you would be surprised how powerful the sense of being grateful!

As the children are in the peak of your nerves, stop what you are doing for a second and think of how Grateful you are about an aspect of your life that has to do with your children. Example: I am Grateful that my children will be sleep soon! Lol
A grateful thought like that will even give you a good laugh!
No matter what you are going through, if you can just remember (the reason why we suffer is because we forget) to think a grateful thought life will be immediately BETTER! Try it, you will like it!

Coach Arthur

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Posted on February 8, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, empowering, Father, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Parents have more POWER than they realize!

Parents have more POWER than they realize!

In addition to being a Life Coach I am also a school administrator, I have worked in the education system for 24 years now. For the last 15 years I have worked, well, really played  (I LOVE My Job) as a school administrator and I have heard a lot, however, there are things that still make me shake my head!

Example:
Having a beautiful girl tell me that her dad tells her she is a drama queen as she cries to him and tells him her sister is harassing/bullying at home broke my heart this week!

My partner in crime and I had to go into damage control attempting to make this dad’s statement less lethal to his daughter as she cried her little eyes out in my office. My partner in crime in her infinite wisdom told her, hey, don’t worry about it, guys are dumb! They don’t know what they are talking about! She then turns and ask me, isn’t that right? Me being the silly adult that I am had to stop myself from cracking up. Believe it or not, this lighten up the mood, The little girl  laughed and for a minute the tears were gone, however, the hurt was real.

As a school administrator there are things I just can’t say to parents, though sometimes I tell them more than I should, I actually have life coaching sessions with some of my parents FREE of charge, however, some issues are just so out of reach.Why doesn’t a Dad know that dismissing his little girl’s feelings are causing her damage? Does he realize the POWER of his words? We are going to assume that he cares and he wants to do BETTER! We are going to assume that if he could do BETTER he would do BETTER!

Parents, your words are SUPER Powerful! None of us should use our words in a negative manner towards our children or any children for that matter.

Is that possible?
Yes, it is!
All you have to do is think before you speak! When you are angry, don’t say anything! And if by chance you do say something to your child that would dim their GOD Light, just apologize and let them know that you won’t do it again!’

Please try hard not to use negative words towards your children!

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Posted on February 2, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, help, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, Parenting, support, Teenagers, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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