Tag Archives: parenthood

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Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 3

Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 3

Teenagers now a days look totally different than we did when we were teenagers (I was a teenager in the 80’s). My Father’s worth issues with me was the fact that I wanted to wear mini-skirts to school, I want to an ALL girl school for goodness sake!!!!! My experience as the Mom of a Teenager is totally different, I have to deal with tattoos, piercing, jeans with holes and other issues I never thought of wearing or doing to my body back in the days.

Sometimes our Teenagers bring friends over who are EXTREMELY interesting looking to say the least! As a parent, what you want to do is tell your child, “stop hanging out with that weird looking kid!” However, lesson number 3 teaches a different way of looking at it.

You need to approach every friend your teenage has with an open mind. Talk to them, ask questions, see where their head is. Open your mind and over look the green, purple, blue hear. Ignore the piercing in the eyebrow, nose, lip and the many, many, many tattles ALL over the place. Listen with your heart.

What are you listening for, is the kid well-mannered? Parents are always telling me that the Cat in NieCat is such a well mannered young lady, and inside I smile and I always say “Thank You GOD! It would be sad if a parent didn’t give her a chance because she has a piercing in her nose (be still my heart).

Listen to what your Teenager say about Her/His Friends. Remember, they consider their friends an extension of them. Thread lightly! Don’t be judgmental. Don’t criticize!!!!!!

If your inner self tells you to address an issue of drugs, skipping school, cursing in your house (a Teenager has to be extremely bold to do this), then, you MUST address this issue with your teenager. If you suspect drugs, you will need more than just a Life Coach, you will need therapy and counseling.

Keep in mind:
1. Being Honest and Candid with your Teenager is the way to go.
2. No judgment!
3 .Remember when you were a teenager!
4. Seek outside help if the situation is one you can’t handle and if there are drugs involved in the friendship.

If you need guidance in traveling the teenage world, don’t hesitate to email me, http://www.niecatlifecoaching@yahoo.com for a FREE 30 minute Parent Life Coaching session.

“Open Your Mind before You open your mouth!” 🙂

Happy Parenting,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on July 1, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, empowering, help, motherhood, support, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 2

Your Teenager Is Here to Teach You Lessons in Life: Lesson # 2

Last week I took My Daughter, The Cat in NieCat to her Freshman College Orientation. There we were parents and children together. As I looked around, there was one thing “visibly” evident in this orientation. About 90% of these Freshmen were on their cellular devices, including Cat.
When they were talking about financial aid, I couldn’t take it anymore and I asked her to put her phone down and I swear she looked like I asked her to go to bed without dinner or walk home from the orientation.

This is the topic of our 2nd Lesson, according to http://www.webmd.com/parenting/teen the actual devices that keep our teens connected are the same devices that keep them away from us – their families. The article actually suggests that taking our teens’ electronic devices can be considered unkind. “Being networked with their friends is critical to most teens,” says Dr. Stuart Goldman, director of psychiatric education at Children’s Hospital in Boston.

As a Teen Life Coach, I agree with the article in the sense that if your teen is doing the right thing, i.e. school (their main responsibility), chores, being respectful, and most importantly not being withdrawn from the family, then, yes, the electronic devices should stay.

However, if your teen is not following through with your expectations, then, I suggest that taking away the cellular device, lap top, games and anything else they consider their life lines is perfectly acceptable.

Suggestions:
1. Have your teen pay for their cellular phone.
2. Phones must be turned off at least an hour before bed time.
3. No computer in the room.
4. Place parents control on the computers and laptops.
5. No phone usage during dinner time or family time.
6. No phone usage during the drive home from school.

The cellular phone is a battle that us teen parents should really not participate in unless is absolutely necessary. Unless of course our rules/regulations/expectations are not being met.

If you need guidance in traveling the teenage world, don’t hesitate to email me, niecatlifecoaching@yahoo.com for a FREE 30 minute Parent Life Coaching session.

Happy Navigating the teen world,

Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on June 24, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, help, Life, mother, motherhood, support, Uncategorized

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Our Children need Our Time!

Our Children need Our Time!

We are all busy, and our jobs take us away from our families more than we care to share. We MUST make the decision to make our Children Our Priority when it comes to our time.

It is a challenge being a school administrator, a life coach and a Mom/Abuelita (GrandMom). Sometimes when I get home ALL I want to do is lay down and take a nap, however, I know that 1990 and 1994 seem like it was just yesterday and my girls are young women now. This all happened very quickly, but I am grateful that I h ad the Wisdom to make times for My Girls.

We MUST find time to spend with Our Children, what I do? Well, Honestly, it was not my idea, it just so happened this suggestion comes from the fact that My Girls ALWAYS followed me around when I got home. The Girls use to and still do lay in my bed as I am resting. We are talking, and sharing and I am resting! The BEST of both worlds.

Choose to find a way to spend time with Your Children regardless of what your day looks like.
Suggestion:
1. Have a game night.
2. Have a conversation hour while you cook, rest, use the bathroom (this happens to me ALL the time), or do your house chores.
3. Use driving time as sharing time.

The idea is to make your children KNOW that you really care and you will find time for Them!

Happy time sharing,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on June 21, 2013 in assistance, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, help, Life, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, support, Teenagers, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Your Child's Self-Esteem

As an Educator and a Life Coach it really makes me sad to hear parents speaking negatively to their children.
I Truly believe that as Parents we MUST give our children boosts of Self-Esteem on a daily basis.

We are Our Children’s first Cheerleaders. From the moment they are born, our job is to bestow Blessings upon Our Children! We MUST pray for them, pray for their steps to be guided. We MUST make sure we do not crush their dreams. Who are we to talk Our Children out of their dreams? GOD has clothed every dream with everything needed to be brought into fruition, that includes our Children’s dreams; don’t destroy them!

Tell your child:
How Proud you are!
How much you LOVE Her/Him!
How bright you see their future!
Find THREE good things to tell Your Child on a daily basis.
Hug your child at least once a day (I MUST work on this one).
Tell Your child you LOVE Him/Her Daily.
Look at your child eye to eye and smile!
Do not speak angry words. Wait until you feel less upset, then, speak!

It is your responsibility to fill Your Child’s bucket of self-esteem to the brim. If you need assistance generating more ideas on how to raise your child’s self-esteem, email me for a FREE 20 minute Life Coaching session, niecatlifecoach@yahoo.com.

Happy Parenting
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on June 10, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, empowering, Father, God, help, inspiration, Life, mother, motherhood, motivation, support, Truth, Uncategorized

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Your Child’s Life has Purpose

Your Child's Life has Purpose

When we were growing up, our adult care takers felt that children should be seeing and not heard. Many of us grew up knowing that getting into a conversation when grown ups were talking was a recipe for disaster in our part. Giving our opinion when we were being reprimanded was a serious no-no in our days.

However, now in 2013 we know that allowing our Children to express themselves is part of the norm. Clearly there should be boundaries as our children interact with others as well as ourselves. Your Child should ALWAYS address you with RESPECT! With that said, the bottom line is that our Children have a purpose.

As a Life Coach I recommend my parent clients to find it within themselves to consider a couple of thoughts:

1. Your Child is here for a Reason. Your Child’s Life has a Purpose.

2. Your Child has a story to tell. No matter the situation, even if you know what your course of action is going to be, allow your Child the opportunity to share their story. This will allow you to see how much insight your Child has gained from the particular situation in question. This will also allow you to be able to reflect in the conversation and determine how you can do better handling the situation the next time.

3. Every Child has a dream in their Heart. Listen to their dream and NEVER destroy their idea. GOD has placed dreams within each one of us and the dream is equipped with everything needed to bring it into fruition. Dare to Believe Your Child’s dreams and aspiration for themselves and support them.

4. You Child’s voice matters! Listen! Listen to understand! Choose to understand, and then, to be understood (Steve Covey).

5. Your Child was Born for Greatness! You need to verbalize this Truth to your child as often as Possible. “Your Child was Born to have an IMPACT in this world.

If you want a game plan on how to put these strategies into practice, email me: niecatlifecoach@yahoo.com for a FREE 20 minute Life Coaching Session.

Happy Purposeful Parenting,
Coach Arthur, Certified Professional Life Coach
http://www.niecatlifecoaching.com

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Posted on May 19, 2013 in assistance, Children, Coaching, consultation, empowering, Father, God, help, inspiration, Metaphysics, mother, motherhood, motivation, support, Truth, Uncategorized

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Our Children Deserve BETTER!

Our Children Deserve BETTER!

I was at Miami Children’s Hospital (I LOVE this hospital) at the Gastro’s office with my First-Born (Nie) and my GrandHon on Wednesday, and I saw something extremely interesting/sad to me.

The office was full of children and parents waiting very patiently. First I noticed that 85% of the children were entertained by some type of electronic device, secondly, I noticed that 10% of them were engrossed on what the Disney channel was showing, and 5% of them were going wild. Here is the interesting part, there was a blond lady on her computer, nothing wrong with that, I was on my iPad the entire THREE hours for the most part, however, she was engrossed in her computer and didn’t realize that her children were going totally crazy, I stared at her to see if I could get her attention and nothing happened. Whatever she was looking at was way more important than her two boys. Then, there was another lady who came in, signed in, and left her son in one part of the doctor’s office and went to sit at another part of the office. That was astonishing to me as the child could not have been more than 5 years old. These boy started wrestling with one of the blond boys and was hurting him. Another lady had to tell him to stop because the little boy was getting super rough! Mind you, neither one of the parents said anything, well one of them couldn’t even see what was happening anyway. I even said out loud, well, if she doesn’t say anything I guess it must be okay, and she still didn’t look up. Now to her defense I did say it in Spanish, maybe she didn’t speak Spanish who knows!

Once they called us in the room, Nie was chasing my GranHon all over the office and she comes back in the room to tell me how the blond lady is now in a room as well with her two boys and on the computer while one of her sons was walking on the ledge of the window!

Come on Parents! We MUST do BETTER than that!!!!!
Children should not have to sacrifice so that we can have the life we want! We have to commit ourselves to our children. Having children and raising them right is a FULL TIME JOB! Period!

If you want to do it right, you have to give up your time! That is truly the ONLY way!

Happy Parenting,
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach

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Posted on March 29, 2013 in Children, Coaching, empowering, help, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, Parenting, support, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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How to become the Parent you want to be:

How to become the Parent you want to be:

There are seven rules to follow to become the parent you want to be:

1. Decide you want to be a BETTER Parent to your children. It ALL begins with a thought!

2. Create boundaries – Your children should understand what is acceptable behavior and what is not.

3. Demand (strong word I know) Respect from your children! You are not your children’s friend, you are the parent. You MUST act like the parent.

4. Make TIME for your children. In order to do this parenting thing effectively, you are going to have to make a decision to be present for/with your children. Live in the MOMENT!

5. Decide in your mind that your Children Come FIRST! Make your Children your # 1 Priority!

6. Listen – Your children have a lot to say!

7. No Judgment – No matter what you hear, do not judge! Share your Wisdom, but allow space to hear the TRUTH!

Happy Parenting
Coach Arthur
Certified Professional Life Coach

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Posted on March 25, 2013 in Children, Coaching, empowering, Father, help, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, Teenagers, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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Words have Power, use them Wisely

Words have Power, use them Wisely

I find this picture very appropriate for today’s message. For those of us who are visual learners, the lesson is in the picture. As parents sometimes we are clueless of the impact our words have on our children. Calling our children names should be a practice that needs to stop the moment you read this blog if this is something you practice. I know sometimes you can’t understand why your children do the things they do. Trust me, I know! I have been at this for 23 years, however, regardless of what you feel you, what your children did or said, you MUST NEVER call your children derogatory name.

Your words have Power! Use your words to bestow Blessings upon your children. There is a reason why you find more than one parent Bestowing Blessings upon their children in the Old Testament.
We also have that Power in 2013.

Bless your children, bestow Blessings upon them daily, but most importantly, please, please, please don’t call them names.

Happy Parenting,
Coach Arthur
Parenting Life Coach

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Posted on March 20, 2013 in Uncategorized

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It ALL Begins & Ends in Your Mind!

It ALL Begins & Ends in Your Mind!

One of the most difficult and rewarding jobs we can have during our earth existence is being a parent. That being said, there are no manuals for this GREAT Task.

I submit to you that if we begin parenting with the thought that parenting begins and ends in our minds, we will accomplish more successful encounters with our children.

If you give Power to following thoughts: I am a good parent, I am patient with my children, I am understanding of the life my children lead when they are in school, I am firm but LOVING to my children, I discipline my Children with respect, I LOVE my children. I know these qualities will take over your life once you allow them into your mind.

Think about it, what if you woke up tomorrow with the above thoughts, plus the thought of having a GREAT weekend with your children in-spite of whatever happened tonight!?

Try it!

It all begins and ends in Your mind. What you give Power to, has Power over You, if you allow it!

Happy Parenting,
Coach Arthur
Parent/Teen Life Coach

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Posted on March 16, 2013 in Children, Coaching, empowering, Father, help, inspiration, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, motivation, Parenting, support, Teenagers, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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I could not believe my ears!

I could believe my ears!

I could hardly believe my ears. I was standing in line at the CVS waiting to take my passport picture when I heard a man utter words that made me physically open my mouth wide. He was talking to a little girl who appeared to be a second to third grader (7 – 9 years old) .

It seemed he left her waiting in the line and for someone reason she got out of the line or allowed others to get in front of her. When he came back he gave her a tongue lashing that was hurtful. He was loud, he was mean, he was harsh, and he was condescending. The more he screamed insults, the smaller she physically became. I felt so bad for her. I wanted to tell him to stop, I wanted to tell her that he was hurting her and the pain was visible, but instead, I did what everyone else did. I stayed quite.

I get it! I am a Mom. Nie is 21 and Cat is 18. During those 22 years I have encountered a lot of challenging situations. I have been really upset, I have been disappointed, I have been heart broken, however, I have done my BEST not to break NieCat’s Spirit. You see, our words have an impact on our children.

The question are:

What type of impact do you want your words to have on your children?

Do you want to build them up?

Do you want to deem their life light?

As a parental coach, one of the main goals that I assist parents with is to think before they respond to an action or words their children say. Take a minute, feel the feeling your child generate within you, feel the words in your mind, but don’t verbalize them. Take a moment, then, speak!

Think before you speak!

Before you say anything in anger, ask yourself, how would you feel if someone else said those same words to you. How would you feel? How would you feel if your child’s teacher said those words to your child?

Think of your childhood! Then, behave accordingly!

Happy Parenting,

Coach Arthur

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Posted on March 2, 2013 in Children, Coaching, Life, Life Coaching, mother, motherhood, Parenting, Truth, Uncategorized, wisdom

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